If you know me, you know that I love making plans. All kinds of plans. I mean, I LOVE them. Everything about them. I love to organize, coordinate, delegate, anticipate, etc. I especially love that after so much time and effort has been put into a plan….. it happens. It’s complete. It’s accomplished. It’s a success. :o)
This is all well and good when planning vacations, events, etc. But what about planning big things? Like, life things?
Erik and I are continuing to pray daily about our desire to be parents. I mentioned in my first post that we’ve always known we wanted to adopt AND have a biological child/ren. Our PLAN has been to have a biological child first then adopt a little later.
“People can make all kinds of plans, but only the Lord's plan will happen.” ~Proverbs 19:21 NCV
Soooo…. We are praying for God’s will/plan for our lives to be revealed to us. Sometimes we think that God is telling us to adopt now! What?!
Sometimes it seems as if God is telling us that we must follow His lead and that He is leading us toward adoption. What?!
Sometimes I think He is waiting to bless us with pregnancy after we adopt to make sure we don’t end up saying, “we never got around to adopting”…. What?!
I don’t know why all of that freaks me out so much…. We want to be parents…. We want to adopt…. We feel that God is leading us in that direction…. So what’s so scary about that?!
I’ll tell you…. ;o)
All of the CHOICES! Domestic (USA) or International adoption? Open, semi-open or confidential adoption (regarding contact with birth parents)? Infant adoption? Older child adoption? What kinds of illnesses are we okay with, if any? ETC….
It’s a huge decision by itself to adopt. Then, to have to choose all of those things and then some…. is overwhelming. I wish we could just give the agency our names and tell them to choose a child for us. We are trying so hard to give all of this over to God and then to feel like we have to “choose” a child based on their location, age, health, etc…. wears me out.
We just have to make sure we are as in tune with the Lord as possible in making all of these decisions. It will take time, that’s for sure. We believe that God has created or will create a child especially for us to adopt. !!!!!!!! How exciting is that?!?!
So, we’ve taken the first step. We’ve requested adoption information packets from a couple of adoption agencies and plan on attending an adoption information meeting next month. This means we’re serious about it. (EEK!!.... and nervous!)
We feel that God is leading us towards adoption, so that’s the direction we’re going. We feel that we’ve been “sitting on” this desire to adopt for when we feel like we should pursue it. We’ve realized that’s just us trying to plan and control how and when we will grow our family. So, we’re putting it ALL in God’s hands….
Are we still trying to conceive? Yes!
What if we get pregnant while going through the adoption process? Praise God!
Will we still adopt? Yes!
Does all of this terrify us? Yes!
“For we walk by faith, not by sight.” ~2 Corinthians 5:7 NKJV
“Without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.” ~ Hebrews 11:6 NIV
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